Losers Party

                                                                       Our sympathies,   You’ve been invited to a

 

 

  Losers   Party

 

 

8:30       Uptight and melodramatic introductions.

 

9:00       Phony conversation, gossip, tension, anxiety.

 

10:00      Painful silences, resentment, withdrawal, passivity, defeatism.

 

11:00      Deep melancholy, soft cello music.

 

 

Quiet time for those who hate their jobs and themselves.

 

 

 

12:00    Tragedy workshops:

 

         – How to grow old and peculiar gracefully.

 

          – How to be used and abused discretely.

 

          – Self-pity self-taught.

 

          – Single neurosis and career psychosis.

 

          – Why your shrink hates my shrink.

 

 

 

1:00    Referrals to internet dates along the singles’ circuit.

 

 

Take a break from your four-wall weekend for some class commiseration.

 

 

          – Free sedatives

 

          – Quality rejections

 

          – New hang-ups to replace old ones

 

          – Snacks from vending machines

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